I am stupid

What a letter in the Coop Magazine this week!

Summary: I am a 35 year old woman. I had an affair with a married man aged 64. Then after a while he answered my calls less and less. I haven't heard from him in 2 months now. Where do I stand?

Her answer: blah, blah, blah it's over.

My answer: Seriously, how fucking stupid are you??? Honestly!!!

Festivals

If you are in serious need of some entertainment at this time of year (and now that the new Miss Schweiz has been crowned - who isn't?) may I suggest two festivals, one each from the French and Italian speaking parts of the country?

Cow fighting.
What more needs to be said!
(Note that the link leads to the "culture" section...)

Chestnut festival.
Expect large delays at the Gotthard Tunnel for this beauty!

That's the Swiss for you, 24 hour party people!

Harvard MBA (Business Planning & Prostitution)

What a plan by the authorities in Bern!

If you want to work as a prostitute you have to submit a detailed buiness plan. See the 10 vor 10 report here.

It is proving to be very difficult for most of the women to put together meaning that only the sharpest business brains are plying their trade in the sidestreets around the parliament.

If ever there was a need for a qualification in business and prostitution (and what an apt combination the two topics are) it is now!

Could the 2 stories possibly be connected in some way???

Cover of 20 Minuten, 14 September 2010.

Top of the front page - police are looking for the pensioner who owns a lot of guns and is roaming free as a sniper having already shot at them in Biel.

Rest of the front page - 13 year old boy is a better marksman than the other approx. 4,800 young children who took part in the state sanctioned shooting competition which is marked by a half day off in Zurich.

Think hard about it Swiss people...the link is staring you right in the face...

"Even Swiss people, on a Saturday night, are capable of losing their minds."

Bono, Letzigrund Zurich, September 11, 2010.

Not like you to ever be wrong Bono, right?

Swiss Club in the USA

Why join?

Because nothing says you're Swiss more than roasting a pig.

(I wonder if they're using roasting in the British or American sense of the word)

Fish...

Like most people, I always thought that there were so many fish in the lake in Zurich due to the cleanliness of the water.

Turns out 60,000,000 fish are hatched out in Stäfa every year and then released into the wild.

Why don't they just put them in a barrel and we can shoot them with our government issued guns?

Would make life a lot easier...

We speak our own happy English. Easy, hey.

Hurry up gentlemen and secure your very own "pullunder" here.

While you're at it, file this one under "other shitty words you read here which are meant to be English" and take it handy in your Beamer....that life you save may just be Swiss.....

Be safe, be Swiss...

The government has spent a lot of money this month to tell you that you need to be careful on ladders.

BE SAFE ON LADDERS THIS SEPTEMBER!!!


Official Swiss Government picture of a ladder.